HALIFAX, Nova Scotia, January 2, 2025 – One of the most startling scenes in the Bible is when Jesus turns on Peter and thunders: Get thee behind me, Satan! You value the things of man, not the things of God. We can only imagine Peter’s confusion when Jesus came out with that. And what had Peter done to earn the rebuke? He’d offered to defend and protect Jesus to the death. But instead of gratefully acknowledging Peter’s (seemingly) generous offer, Jesus attacked it and revealed it for what it was – inspired by Satan.

I like this scene because it unflinchingly exposes the misapplication of love. Far too many Christians falsely believe that “love is love” and as such takes precedence over all other human interactions. They are taught by their pastors to love selflessly, illogically, persistently, and yes, even aggressively, including where their love is not welcome. They are taught to love in all cases and under every circumstance, but is that really what Jesus taught his followers to do?

I would argue “no”. Jesus taught us to be obedient to God in all cases and under every circumstance and showed by his example what obedience looks like. In the scene referenced above, Peter responded with misapplied love rather than responding with obedience to God. Jesus was in the process of revealing the prophesied and God-ordained trial he had to undergo, but all Peter heard was that Jesus would suffer, and he wanted to protect Jesus.

How many times have we done that in the course of “being Christian”? We think we’re doing the right thing by wanting to protect people from their trials, but in trying to protect them, are we valuing the things of God or the things of man? Are we in fact acting as emissaries of Satan rather than of Jesus?

As born-again believers, we’re called to love our enemies. It is the highest calling of any human. But loving your enemies means praying for them and blessing them; it doesn’t mean forcing your unwelcome affections on them. You don’t tell your enemies you’re praying for them and blessing them; you just pray for them and bless them where they can’t see or hear you doing it. You do it in secret, like Jesus advised. That is genuine spiritual warfare.

Christians can be the most insufferable and creepy people on the planet when they go around parading their “love” and forcing it on people who don’t want it. What good is it to tell people that God loves them if those people hate God or don’t believe he exists? The number one reason why I despised Christians when I was an atheist is because they tried to push their beliefs on me. I didn’t push mine on them, but they insisted on pushing their beliefs on me. Their pushiness didn’t make me a believer. They thought they were doing something good by “sharing” and preaching, but all they were doing was making me despise them and their message even more.

Jesus emphasized that the first Commandment is to love God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. We are to treat others as we would want to be treated and to pray for and bless even our enemies, but all our love goes to God. All our obedience goes to God. That is the first and greatest Commandment.

Jesus didn’t go around forcing his love on people; he healed those who came to him for healing and taught those who came to him to learn. There is not one verse in the Gospels where Jesus is seen shouting “God loves you!” to random strangers. If Jesus didn’t do it, neither should we.

If you don’t want to be rebuked like Peter, you need to value the things of God, not the things of man. Love God and be fully obedient to him. If God has ordained someone for a trial, let them go through that trial. If God has ordained you to help someone, help them.

Only by giving all your love and obedience to God will you know when to openly love and when to step back.