HALIFAX, Nova Scotia, February 21, 2025 – One of the most annoying assumptions many non-Christians have about Christians is that they like everyone. And I mean everyone, including and especially the people who go out of their way to make themselves unlikeable. Christians, according to non-Christians, are supposed to like everyone in every situation at all times, with zero exceptions.

But what does Jesus say about that?

Jesus taught us that we’re to love our enemies and to treat others as we’d want to be treated, but he didn’t say anything about liking everyone. And why is that? Because you can’t mandate liking someone. You can’t force people to feel affection toward a certain person or group. You can mandate specific behaviors (like loving your enemies via prayers and blessings), but you can’t mandate feelings. And genuinely liking someone and wanting to spend time with that person is feelings-based behavior that can’t be forced or expected, even from born-again believers. God allows us to dislike people as an honest expression of our feelings toward them, but he still expects us to treat them as we would want to be treated, which essentially means don’t be mean-spirited. Don’t bully them. But don’t pretend to like them if you don’t. God hates hypocrisy.

The same assumption that non-Christians have about Christians liking everyone has also bled into the worldly church, where it’s assumed that because we’re in a church building attending a church event, we’re all one big happy family and the best of friends. Anyone who’s spent any time at all in a worldly church event knows this is woefully untrue. Despite most pastors’ ongoing efforts to make their flocks feel at ease and at home, some sheep will still rub you the wrong way (even physically; pervy old greeters posted at the church door, take note!). I have never more than fleetingly felt “at home” in a worldly church setting, though I don’t blame the pastors for that. It’s baked into the scenario that you’re not going to like everyone and not everyone is going to like you. Even in a church.

And that’s OK.

The Bible says so.

Jesus’ disciples were well-known for not always getting along with each other, especially the men with the women. Jesus had to step in to keep the peace between them on more than one occasion. And after Jesus’ ascension, the early Church members had numerous run-ins with each other, most famously Paul vs Barnabas and Paul vs “the saints in Jerusalem”. Paul didn’t have to like the people he disagreed with any more than they had to like him. Nowhere in the Bible does it say we have to like everyone without exception. We’re to bless and pray for those who purposely oppose us, but like them?

Naaah.

God gives us the freedom to like and dislike whoever we choose. He doesn’t mandate like.

In Heaven, though – Heaven is a whole different ball game. We’ll not only love everyone in Heaven, we’ll like them, too, and we won’t have to be mandated to do so. But that’s Heaven. Here on Earth, it’s more important to God that we do his will than that we pretend to like someone we don’t.